If you look up elopement you will see definitions that center around running off in secret to get married in a quick and private manner. While these may fit the dictionary definition of the term, the new reality is that there are different levels and types of eloping. Yes, you can still run off in secret to the courthouse or hop on a plane to Las Vegas if you are an elopement purist. Hollywood has given the public a distorted and romanticized perspective on this practice. I submit for your perusal the Rich Events new lexicon for elopement weddings.
#1) Secret Elopement (local or out of town)
This is a private wedding ceremony with only bride, groom, officiant and a witness. This ceremony is not announced to family and friends until after it takes place. This is what most people think of when they hear "elope." The bride and groom decide to marry, they get the marriage licence, they secure an officiant and a witness and they get married without telling anyone what they are doing. Often times these ceremonies take place at a courthouse, a wedding chapel, or in a location convenient to the couple and the officiant. There are no vendors other than the officiant, i.e. no photographer, no florist, no musicians. There is no rented tuxedo or wedding dress. It is simply a legal ceremony and nothing more.
#2) Planned Local Elopement
This is a semi-private wedding ceremony that includes bride, groom, officiant and a very close circle of immediate family and or closest friends, usually numbering only 3 to 5 people. The bride and groom may each buy a new outfit to wear, but something they can easily wear again. They may or may not have boutonniere and bouquet. Usually they will just have one or two of the friends or family in attendance take some snap shots. There is usually no music or processional. Everyone simply gathers together and the officiant begins the ceremony when all are ready. These ceremonies are often in a home, a public park, in the chapel of a church or in a wedding chapel or other rented venue that specializes in elopement ceremonies. Local examples in Nashville include Belmont Mansion, The Ambrose House, Cabinberry Farm, The Baber House, The Wild Turkey Ranch and The Pick Inn, just to name a few.
#3) Planned Out-of-Town Elopement
This is a semi-private wedding ceremony that includes the bride, groom, officiant and a very close, small circle of family and friends who go out of town as a group to a favorite destination for a small, simple wedding. The destination is as much a part of the event as the ceremony. Popular examples among Nashvillians include beach weddings in Destin, Florida and mountain weddings in Gatlinburg. A slightly more elaborate and planned version is a cruise wedding. Some cruise lines offer small wedding venues and officiants for on-board ceremonies. The ship is the venue and the cruise is the honeymoon! This option is popular with couples who may be marrying for the second time and like the idea of sharing the entire experience with their children or other close friends/family.
Whether a couple chooses to run off to the justice of the peace, go to a local minister's office or take a small group with them to a favorite spot, eloping can be a great way to start off married life. These ceremonies require minimal expense, minimal planning and minimal stress. This is a great option for the cash-strapped couple who wants to marry but doesn't have the funds for a lavish event. It is an equally good option for the couple who has ample funds but would rather use those funds for something else, like a nice honeymoon, a down payment on a house, or debt retirement--particularly of student loans or credit card debt. Many couples don't realize how expensive and how involved a wedding is until they are neck deep in the planning process. Dresses, flowers, invitations, photographers, venues, caterers, limos, tuxes, cakes...it can run into the tens of thousands of dollars very quickly. For those who have the funds and the desire to have the big wedding, I am more than happy to plan, coordinate and officiate for you! For the others of you who have different needs, different budgets or different priorities, there are ways of having a memorable wedding without the need for a congressional bailout.
I have officiated and coordinated lots and lots of weddings from the simplest possible secret elopement to the most elaborate traditional wedding with reception. When it is all said and done, all of my weddings, big and small, end the same way...my signature on a marriage license, an envelope and one postage stamp all making their way to the county clerk.